I have many things to write down. I seem to harvest something. How to start? En, Anyway, let’s begin. Recently, I always listen some words, such as “my vegetable has been stolen by some one.” Or “I am waiting for some hours ahead screen, because I will get my mature fruit back and stole others.”, which spoken out by students, even my leader. Oh god, That’s very funny. But, I don’t like it at all. I don’t know why. Although I owned account which applied by honey, I never play it. Maybe I am addict to take photo and camera totally. At beginning, I like sound from which I pressed shutter of camera. Then I found photography is so amazing to attract me to explore and discover. I bought a camera and a Len in period of financial crisis(During this period, Canon company cut off staff and improve cost). Hence I cherish them so much. Sometimes, honey complained me that I spend much time on it and ignore her. In here, apologized first, I will pay more attention in future. Of course, at beginning, I lack some important knowledge, such as understanding of photography, skills, aesthetic eyesight and special view, which affect quality of photo. But, those factors are inspiring me to explore meaningful journey and discover beauty around us. By the way, there is the other thing I must mention. In a “Protect our environment” activity which held by our company, organization selected two photos I took and uploaded them on online gallery of our company. Where amazing happened. This award facilitate directly my passion on photography. I will appreciate honey, because she assisted me to pick two photos up from album. Honey strongly recommended that <Night At Museum II> is a very funny movie. I doubted that first. That’s why I haven’t seen <Night At Museum I>. After I watched it, that’s so funny, so cool. I like it so much. The movie made me so happy and told me a truth that Do things you like, Stay with people you like. Yeah, it’s true. Suddenly, I felt that I has been released. I don’t care how much salary I earned, I don’t care when I am promoted. The point is step by step. I know I am doing right things I like and staying with people I like. That’s enough, isn’t it? Now, Coffee is essential drinking in my daily life. Previously, I didn’t like drinking it. I don’t know how to start. Maybe I feel tired or I feel boring, even I want to pretend that I have taste. Whatever any starting, I like drinking coffee finally. In order to bring a relax and happy mood while I am drinking coffee, honey gave me a starbucks’ coffee cup as gift. I am so touched really, I know she spent her pin money on it. I have to say this feeling is so good. Since end of last year, our company cut off some staff at long intervals. Fortunately, I am one of survivals. However, company is being re-organized. It’s said I will be transferred to the other team which its products are for AS400 platform. I haven’t known AS400 platform and its related development languages before, such as CL and RPG. If I would be transferred, it’s no doubt that there is a virgin area waiting for me. Challenge is everywhere. Be cool, be funny. There is a lyric could express my feeling “That’s a way, aha, aha, I like it, aha, aha.”One more thing, I have stepped that I am studying how to investment and do in practice. That’s why I deeply knew that I spent two more years to show I am not a moneymaker. How about investment? God knows.

I found I am smoothly losting direction of life. I wanna complain any unfair things, but I don't. Because I know it is useless. I always lose my temper so that I can not solve problem finally. After all, U will be look so bad while u r losing temper. But, how do i wipe out unhappiness? And once u suffered a bad thing, so more and more unlucky things would coming soon. Although u wanna change current situation to deal with or face tough things, they never give u a little breathing space. The future is becoming unclear. It's awful that it would be continued.

I want to write many many things what happened. However I do not know how to start. I found I am not a logical thinker.
Whatever, high pressure of working, current financial crisis and expected dream of parents let me never escape out.  To be honest, I start to hating this boring social generally. I finally understand some people would suicide or kill others in order to revenge social. As previously, I doubted that why I can not do better than others. Because I am lazy, I don't like doing IT. But I am wrong, When I try my best to change situation, promotion is still hard for me. Yesterday, I got 3 as my score of Total Prefermence Management for whole year. 3 means that no promotion and little incressment of salary. The score make me feel fucking sick. Management totally ignored my effort and contribution for company. Complain is useless. That is why hundreds and thousands graduated students are hunting it.

Woo..., almost 6 months I haven't updated here yet. Since cancelled Internet connection service, I am losting interesting for internet smoothly. Coz I don't watch screen again after be off work which is last nearly 10 hours per day. In addition, I became lazy, even no passion to change my current status. Just like playing video game at entainment square is addiction. Unhealth and borning life status is closely to me. I could not benefit form daliy working. I don't know whether I like doing present work. However, I am sure there is a dark future if hold this job. Lucky, nowadays, I haven't been fired by company yet in this economic winter. So to change direction of major is becoming a fresh idea in brain.   Will it be come true during following 2009 year? I hope so. 

Until today, I encouraged myself to write this blog to remember people who lose life in this serious disaster, to remember all heroes who rescued people's life day by day. At meanwhile, we should encourage people who escape from dead ghost should keep going better and better, although some of them lose their relatives.

 

Not only a huge loss and a great amount of people injured and dead the black 5.12 gave us, but also it is bringing us a big love. There is a good proverb shows no matter how much disaster they burden, it will become a very tiny partition, because it is divided with i billion and 3 thousand million; no matter how much love we give, it will become a very huge love, because it is multiplied by 1 billion and 3 thousand million. I am really touched by the proverb. Because, it can show our Chinese are great. We don't lower our great heads. In converse, we will become stronger than before. This is our spirit of great nation. I believe that we can overcome everything all the time.

 

We don't forget those touched pictures which let us flow tear. We pray for them to rebuild their beautiful home town, recover their health. As Premier Wen said:" although you are alive, I hope you can enjoy your life.

 

Let us condole them together... 

This is a very exciting day! Torch Relay activity held in Guangzhou today. And I don't know how to describe my feeling, besides exciting, only exciting left. I saw so many flags were swung, brilliant smile, tears of joy and exciting. I heard resounding voice "China, Come on", "Go, China". This is a great time. This is a great moment. We were waiting for a national victory which belong to all Chinese rather than Torch Relay. Everybody is proud of China. While we saw Shen Xiangfu who is one of Torch Relay Hands run slowly towards us, we witnessed the historic moment. Next, Torch Relay will cross many cities of China and arrive at Beijing finally. I believe 2008 Beijing Olympic games must be successful.

Congratulate honey to get the first place with her dance team in Dance with Wind activity of University.

 

The day before yesterday, i went to watch her performance as one of members in support team. Actually, I suddenly felt a  warm and kind atmosphere when i stepped into hall of campus. The scene seems like so familiar to make me recall some activities i participated in while I studied in university. The campus living is really a special and wonderful process during whole life for everyone.

 

Before, their college continues to hold the first place twice. To be continued to get the No.1 everyone wishes. It is no doubt that there is enough heavy pressure for them. Hence, that day, my main tasks were certainly to support her and take pictures. They had been arranged to enter stage at the 12th, so, I should adjust camera first in order to avoid take unclear or dark pictures. That's why i have blank experience to take stage pictures. Finally, I went out from support team and found a better place to take pictures. With the strongest applause, they were on the stage to show. I had no time to select other angles, just pressed shutter button nonstop. During short 5 mins, i took about 60 pictures to record their every moment. After approxximate 30 minutes, judges confirmed their every moment i took is perfect. They are No.1.

 

In the evening, we had a nice dinner with my good friend who came from Shenzhen. He was so happy and treated us, because he made a new girlfriend. Congratulations! We enjoyed that evening indeed. That's why we seldom were together after we graduated.

 

For me, I haven't any change. My working is busier than before. The routine makes me so boring everyday. But I have nothing complaint. At least, the calm life doesn't provide enough materials to write a blog.

 

Since every boby was born with crying, he/she was destined to compete in society and family. At the beginning, parents are proud of their own baby who is more beautiful, white, fat and cute than other babies. With baby grows up, parents care of children's intelligence higher than others. Next, to compare grade whose is higher in school, to compare who is matriculated by famous university. As following, to compare who is employed by famous company, to compare how much money earned by own children, even, to compare whose bf or gf is better than others. That is really ridiculous. It is no doubt said that parents wish their own children cause easily dark feeling for their own future. Everyone has own ideal, aim and life. Meanwhile, i also believe ideal will be affected by others or affect  others. For the same way which maybe suit for someone, but it isn't suit for self. In my opinion, to compete with others is just for result, to compete with self is for own ideal.

The “understand” is comparatively interesting word. That is why the word could express accurate feeling which people understand each other. The word “under” and the word “stand” compose “understand”. In my opinion, the word “understand” could extent meaning that A stands under the B. That means A understands the B. I think. Actually, understanding is hard to carry with when something happened. I am not sure how to explain “understand” by other people? I do not know whether everybody is capable to deal with understanding finely. At least, I can not. I must appreciate honey in here. Because she gave me understanding that she gave up her interesting in order to care my feeling and will not blunt my good mood. I remembered that I have written a blog about her interesting and my personal problems for her interesting. Her hobby is dancing, and her performance is very good. Consequently, so many opportunities will visit her certainly. General speaking, I support her interesting at all. But I do not like to see she dance with other guys. Although I know it belongs to normal society, I could not accept it still. To face new performance opportunity coming, she gave it up. It is not easy for her who is like dancing so much. It is no doubt that she paid more sacrifice than me. Contrary to what she made a decision, I always think about my own feeling. I have persuaded me to let she dance with guys so many times. Finally, I am failure and am not able to conquer myself to accept it. I would like to say sorry for her.

Rich life always makes people satisfy current situation or feel life hope. So to enrich your own life is key factor which make you happy and open wide eye sights. Now, I am so glad to say my life is richer than before, that is why I have a destination. I remembered that I could not look for forward way in future before, because I have no accurate aim. Although I know what I want to get, I still have no way to do my effort on it. After I came back Guangzhou, I thought of my future again. Finally, according to myself current situation and to combine with personal willing, I made a decision. Fortunately, my parents kindly go along with the decision and encourage me to keep going. I don’t know whether this decision would bring me what I want? I don’t know how many challenges do I face? I don’t know how much pressure do I burden? After all, that is my choice. No matter how result of choice is, I believe I could not regret for that. At least, I try my best to catch my aim.

Feb 2008 was the first valentine day for me. I do not know I should say “congratulations” to me or say “you are such a failure guy”. Whatever words to me, this was worth remembering day. Although my work is very busy, that day is very important for us. Hence I applied one day as annual leave to accompany with her. According to plan last year, we planed to engage to each other and buy a pairs of rings to prove. However, there are two reasons to postpone this plan. Honey could understand me very much and no any complain. Certainly, flowers, card and chocolates are necessary. Although those gifts are traditional, no creative, traditional gifts are forever, I think. Due to I had booked 11 flowers and bought a large card with words I wrote before two days, she did not know whether I had prepared them. At 9 o’clock of morning, carrier delivered flowers to me. While I gave honey a bind of fresh red rose flowers and a large card, honey moved and cried. I felt a bit of pride. Afternoon, Honey must treat me to eat Hangendas ice cream with her money that eldership gave her as lunar New Year gift. We ordered a sweat chocolate ice cream chaffy dish which was new style for valentine day. It tasted very nice.  In fact, no matter how to enjoy valentine day, it is important that we could express our mutual emotion to each other. That is the best happiness. Wish all lovers happiness.

Acknowledge:

Leon who is my colleague come from Nanchang and graduated Nanchang University. He helped me to buy two train tickets. I want to appreciate my honey who is a very tough girl and accompany with me to back home. And thanks our government, police, crew, medical staff who assure our journey safety. Thanks all passengers’ cooperation. Thanks all martyrs who rescue electric equipments in this snow disaster.

Backgrounds

3 millions and 500 thousands passengers stayed in Guangzhou train station. Thousands on thousands policemen maintained order day by day. Without electric equipment, The Railway Ministry dispatched all available trains with internal-combustion engine from everywhere to support Guangzhou. Premier Wen flied to Guangzhou and visited station to encourage passengers. Within 10 days, 3,500,000 passengers came back hometown. It is no doubt that this is a great miracle. If you do not undergo by yourself, you never know, never understand how a great miracle is. I never forget it.

Experience

Since I enrolled into queue to wait for train in train station, I made a decision to record this remembered journey. I have no time to write it down all along until today. Anyway, this journey gave ma a strong impression that due to about nine provinces of southern China suffered the heaviest snow disaster since 1958 year lead to wide electric network was paralysis, some rails were out of work, part airports were closed, several highways were blocked, thousands upon thousands people crowded in train station to wait for trains in order to back home and enjoy the Chinese tradition new year with their family. There are two train stations in Guangzhou. One is Guangzhou train station. The other is Guangzhou eastern train station. We watched TV news before we left. The situation in Guangzhou station was worse than Guangzhou eastern station. As report, people count was max 500 thousands in Guangzhou station. There were max 50 thousands in Guangzhou eastern station. At meanwhile, Guangzhou Rails Ministry decided to stop selling train tickets after 25^th Jan 2008 in order to control people count. We had double luck. Because we could bought two train tickets and got on train in Guangzhou eastern station. I could remember clearly that day 1^st Feb 2008. When I was off work at 5:30, honey and I went to train station to catch up train. My office is closed to train station, just one station only by metro or bus. However, when we arrived at Guangzhou eastern station, we could not find entrance. That’s why normal entrances were closed due to large people count. Thousands upon thousand police and armed police were maintaining order of queues. According to prescriptive routine, we walked about 400 meters then found entrance. To make me big surprise, the entrance was under my office. Policemen divided people into several areas to avoid to crowd and disorder. Their aim was to protect people’s life safe. From that moment, we did not know when we could get on train. And we did not come back, because a large amount of people behind of us, just waiting.

(Round 1) At the beginning, people run forward to Guangzhou eastern station. I run faster than honey and pulled her hand to make her tumble. She put up with pain to continue running. I was so sorry to her. After about 30 minutes, we arrived at square of Guangzhou eastern station. Waiting Room was in the front of us. We were happy.

(Round 2) We stood up on square which included approximate 20 thousands people. Every person has eager eyes to hope trains coming and get on train to back home. We did not know how many hours we would wait for. It was chilly out and rained. And to plus we had not supper, we felt tired at that moment. Due to I had no related experience before, I just bought a bag of bread, two boxes instant noodle, two cups of milk tea and two bottles of pure water. There were no enough foods for supporting us, we must save energy first then had less food. I worried about honey so much and was afraid she could not sustain all along. She is strong girl indeed.  About 8 o’clock, we wanted to have less bread. While I picked foods out of box, zip was out of service. I could not open it. I felt helpless. I did not want to break box, because of our clothes were in it as well. However, I had no any other choice. If I did not break box, we could not have foods. As following journey, I must care that box much than before, its zip was broken. Midnight was coming. We entered into waiting room.

(Round 3) Waiting rooms were built casually for special situation. We still did not know when we get on train, but we knew that we closed to train. A large amount of people crowed in waiting rooms which were like refuse dump. Everywhere was covered with garbage. We could not look for spare space to have a rest. About two hours passed, we walked through waiting room and entered inner Guangzhou eastern station. Guangzhou Rail Ministry declared that passengers would get on any trains. It means that if that train could arrive at destination which you want to, you would get on train, no classes to be specified. Fortunately, when we entered in Guangzhou eastern station, we heard that this way is to Nanchang direction. Absolutely, we were tired while we sat down two seats. We spent about 10 hours from waiting to getting on train. However, to compare those people who waited for several days, we were lucky.

(Round 4) We sat down seats and slept several hours. While train leader came into our carriage, I just wanted to charge fee. Because our train was normal class and we had seats only, but, our tickets showed that we should get on high-speed class train and have beds. The train leader asked me:” do you need beds? There are some beds available now.” “Yes, we need.” I answered. That is it. We did not need returned fee. We need beds to have a rest, I thought. A new problem came out that the 5^th cabbage had beds, we were in the 17^th cabbage. That means we should walk from the 17^th cabbage to 5^th cabbage. That was tough task. That is why about two hundreds people crowded in each carriage. We wanted to wait for train stopping in station, and then we could get off train and get on again form 5^th cabbage of train. But staff rejected our thinking. He said:” you have no enough time to walk, even run from 17^th cabbage to 5^th cabbage, because train stops in station for 1 minute only.” Hence, we should walk to 5^th cabbage in train. Until today, that is unbelievable. How we walk through 12 cabbages. Finally we got there. Honey’s clothes became black from white. My white shoes were also. We felt relax so much. Next we should solve hungry problem. We just ate a bag of bread and drank a bottle of pure water in 25 hours. At that time, convenient noodle was the hottest food. However, there was no hot water to provide in train. Under that situation, we just bought some fast food to eat. Until 10 pm of that day, we arrived at Nanchang train station. Thanks God. We could back to home finally. I saw beautiful smile on her face. While we got off train, honey played snow on the way to home.  We spent 31 hours to back home. Yes indeed, we were luck. We felt very happy although we were tired.

Last week, I was so happy to get two train tickets back to Nanchang. Now, I am so sad because of weather is worse than several days before and tend to be worse. According to the latest transport and weather condition, with strong storm coming, so many important, key transport ways are being blocked, which include railways, highways and airlines. In Guangzhou railway station, about 150 thousands people are staying in there in order to get in backing train. I really want to back to home indeed. I miss my parents so much. Specially, I want to accompany with them to enjoy spring festival. And honey wants to back to Nanchang either. If we can enjoy festival together, what a happiness holiday! At beginning, I was so exciting when I heard it is heavy snow in Nanchang. Because she never look snow downing, since she has settled in Guangzhou. So I want to take honey to look snow. I think honey should enjoy nice snow landscape in Nanchang this time. But, I can not believe it is not a good signal which foreshow 2008 year is the harvest year, disaster is coming.

Before, I did not know what is love? I did not know what is true love? I did not know how to love a person? I did not know how to express love? Now, I just know what love is, may be true love. Because I really do not know how is true love? Time will prove everything, answer will be out at the end of life, I think. However, I still do not know how to love a person and how to express love? In my opinion, these two questions would be integrated together. While you express love to your lover, this behavior is to tell him/her you love him/her. But, do you know whether he/she could accept your expression of the love. Everyone is difference. You maybe think he/she could feel your love or accept your expression of the love. In converse, he/she maybe feel that expression of the love is hard to understand. Hence, mutual understanding is very key factor. If you encounter some problems or express love to lover, you had better take into account him/her feelings first before you do action. In addition, to control temper is the other important factor. While he/she does not understanding your expression of the love, or you are angry at him/her behavior, please control your temper first. That is why you should not be angry at person who accompany with you all lifetime in the world.

Last Saturday, owing to serious headache, I was sleep almost whole day. Until night, I felt a little better after shower. I don't know why I caught cold easily while weather became warm. Guangzhou's weather is warmer than past year. It is warm winter absolutely. Honey spent all day to accompany with me so that she has not enough time to prepare Accounting subject which was hold on Tuesday. I am so sorry indeed! The day before yesterday, I applied continuing two annual leaves to enjoy Spring Festival with family. To be cheerful, honey and I will come back Nanchang together this time. Although honey had been to Nanchang during her summer holiday last year, this is the first time to come back Nanchang to enjoy Spring Festival with my family. It is very exciting. With the Spring Festival is coming soon, a large amount of people will come back hometown and for me without exception. Since I'm work in Guangzhou far away from Nanchang, I will be about to every coming back trip. Before, I didn't care what's situation of transport at all during spring festival. And now I usually watch TV shows how many farmer-workers can not buy tickets to come back? Or, many of people were crowd into a train to stand over dozen of hours. I'm always afraid I can not buy tickets. For example, Due to work schedule, I went back home ahead one day past year. Hence, it is normally that I could not buy train ticket, just plane ticket. Actually, to buy plane ticket is easier than train ticket. That is why the former is much expensive than the latter. For me, to take plane is not convenience. So, I am plan to ahead 4 days to come back in order to buy tickets easily.

2000-2001, we came from every where of the mainland, went to beautiful university, lived and studied together. I remembered that we were strange each other.

 

2001-2002, boys usually played computer games whole day and night. Skip classes is common situation. Certainly, boys were failed testing is common situation as

well. Girls were good study examples.

 

2002-2003, more couple of lovers appeared in our class, and we continued doing skip classes activity.

 

2003-2004, we graduated from university together and went to every where.

 

And now…

 

In past year, three more friends had married.Two weeks ago, one of good friends told me she is being pregnant and her lovely baby will come to the beautiful world after 7 months. Congratulations! She will be mother right now.

 

About one week ago, the other good friend told me she will marry on end of January and invite me to enroll her wedding party. I am regret that I could not attend it due to schedule is so nervous. Wish her happiness forever in here.

 

In 2008, some friends had told me they will plan to marry this year.

 

Gently, we will have own family.

 

Maybe 5 years or 10 years later.

 

How about our family and career?

 

I do not know.

 

I just know how time flies

This article is for my blog accessing into the third year.

 

It has accompanied with me for two years. 2008 year is the third year for this blog which had record my life, viewpoints, mood, feeling, emotion, and experience and so on during past two years. And now, it has become a part of my life. I like writing anything on it. While I want to confide, it is just like a warm home while is belongs to me, to record quietly each moving moment of life and thinking of live. While I want to review my past, it is just like every thumbnail to show in the front of me one by one. With I grow up year by year, my blog is my great witness on the way of my growth. After 10 years, 20 years or more maybe, I will review past experience of myself. I am able to image what is scene, but I can not feel that feeling.

 

While we enjoy a traveling, we usually complain that I forgot no take camera to snapshoot this beautiful scenery or my camera has no power so that I could not record that wonderful moment. We always miss much beautiful scenery, remembered people and meaningful things in life. So, to record them around of you seems like more important and meaningful. Hence, I always think of what how to make perfect life for me. Actually, it has no concrete answer indeed, because everyone has different viewpoint for above question with different philosophy. For me, perfect life is made of to decrease regret of live as possible as I can.

2008 year is coming soon. It is fantastic year which has so many wonderful things will be happened, the best exciting is 2008 Beijing Olympic Game to be held on this summer of this year. We have brought tickets to memorize each beautiful and amazing moment. Tonight, Honey and me will go to square to count backwards to welcome New Year coming. Best wishes to all! Happy New Year!

Last Saturday, I were accompany with Honey to enroll into CET-4. Suddenly, the past special scene rushed into my brain, which I participated in CET-4 at that time when I walked in campus and saw a large amount of students preparing test. This is the first time to feel that I was out of campus totally. I can not help to smile while I recalled I handed in testing fee for CET-4 three times in total. Even, I spent much money on English materials for review. At that time, I felt pain and regretted that I failed to pass examination, due to I didn't do my effort for it. But now, it is very interesting experience for me, just smile it, I think. To speak several wish words to Honey and look after she confidently walked into classroom, I sat in McDonald’s restaurant to read Bill Clinton's autobiography. Three women and a man brought Clinton an amazing life. His Mom gave him life of love. His wife gave him love of life. His daughter gave him cheerful life. His grandfather taught him how to be a person. Although his story is very length, its meaning is wonderful and helps me to better understand life, love, society, aim, family and so on. I maybe have not Clinton’s achievement, but I am able to absorb his successful experience and add my personal life in order to short time of to get success.